How to brag about your wins without sounding like an a*shole

Imagine you received a message reading/saying "hey, I just achieved this cool thing at work. I want to celebrate, are you available?" Chances are that person is a close friend and that you are absolutely ecstatic for them. That is the close circle celebrations.

But about bragging though? Being over the moon, on top of the world, and proud of what you have accomplished?

Bragging presents two challenges:

1. Being proud of what you have achieved amidst hardships and losses that other people are experiencing. And when it comes to social media, the situation can quickly escalate into negativity and steal your thunder.

2. However, the biggest challenge is your own attitude toward bragging. If you feel like bragging is wrong but say "eff it, I'm proud of myself" your experience can turn sour quickly when confronted by resistance.

What you need to know before you can 'brag differently'

It is okay to brag

Life exists beyond hardships and problems and said issues will never be wiped out for you to feel comfortable to brag. If the idea of blowing your own trumpet scares you, that is okay but it doesn't mean that bragging is bad.

People will always be uncomfortable with bragging

Remember bragging is not a socially accepted behaviour and it might seem like poor taste to some people. The bottom line is that it makes people uncomfortable, and you should expect some resistance but it is not aimed at you. However, once the others see you sing your praise, they will understand that sharing their work and achievements is not bad at all.

Bragging is stating facts

Contrary to what bragging is labeled, it is simply stating facts about your work, or story, to advance a personal goal. There's no lying or gasing anything up. In fact, it has more to do with excellent communication skills than showing off.

Moreover, if you don't communicate your wins, how will you network better, how will your boss reward you, and how will you have a clear picture of what YOU do?

Here's how to do it

Embrace your wins and voice

You have to first know that your accomplishments matter and are worth talking about! You may not win a big shiny award, but communicating your wins can help you advance. In fact, you know you are bragging better if your bragging brings more value to your table.

Know your imposter syndrome

Imposter syndrome is like that kid on the school playground who sneaks up on you and slaps your eats out of your hand. It is that feeling or idea that you aren't qualified for what you are doing and that everyone will figure you out. So if you have this fear lurking inside you, you are prone to be annoying with your bragging and people will really not like that.

How to deal with imposter syndrome

According to Meredith Fineman, entrepreneur, writer, speaker, and author of Brag Better: Master the Art of Fearless Self-Promotion, having irrational fear from imposter syndrome is actually a good thing.

"Someone who is mediocre isn’t worried because they lack the self-awareness required for impostor syndrome. I believe that fear is a key ingredient in being great at your gig. The same goes for fears of bragging too much: Anyone who overdoes it, can’t read a room, or never promotes anyone else (bragging is absolutely a team sport) is not the one whose accomplishments are actually something to talk about," she told Cosmopolitan.

Accept bragging as part of the job

You don't have to brag if you don't want to, but if you feel like it that is just part of doing a good job and recognising it. Everyone is lost in their heads and problems and no one really knows what you do or how so bragging can be a breather for everyone to appreciate themselves. It also shows others that you are doing your job as a team player and other titles you may be subjected to.

Show only the good stuff

When you're going to brag differently, you cannot have complaints overshadow your good work. Because that is what people will focus on if you give it to them. Be positive and let optimism carry you. State facts, present stats or evidence, and references around what you do or what you are trying to communicate. Do it strategically, creatively, and directly.